Tag: fathers

No Help for Single Fathers

yet again.

One of the projects the research center I’m employed at is working on the the evaluation of a noncustodial parent earned income tax credit in New York City.  The way it works now, custodial parents (read: mothers) get a tax credit and noncustodial parents (read: fathers) don’t.

This experimental tax credit is geared towards low-income black fathers with child support orders.  The goal is to incentivize paying child support, and is really a round about way of incentivizing legit work.  Sounds good in principle but it’s really a mess.  The cap to get the tax credit is something crazy small that you could only make if you didn’t work all year and if you don’t work all year, how can you be current on your child support.  whomp.

Anyway the blow came because this great nation can’t get all it’s systems to work together and basically it was decided this tax credit could never go federal because the child support system is run by the states not the federal government and they didn’t think they’d be able to get both systems to work together to get the credit out to the men.

Another program for low-income, low-education, predominately men of color bites the dust.

peace,
e.

On Choosing Single Motherhood

So I was perusing some blogs and someone mentioned this one – some single women choosing the single mother route.

“I don’t need a man to have a baby. I don’t have to find “The One” and fall in love and get married to procreate. My body doesn’t actually care if Cupid has shot my heart straight through with arrows. Love and sentiment technically have nothing to do with the fact that since my menstrual blood began I have been able to have a baby — whenever I want.”

This concept is not new to me, it just frustrates me.   Yes, one doesn’t need a man to have a baby but so much research shows the benefits of two parents.  I was raised by a single parent, and it was ideal considering what my father was up to, but that wasn’t the choice that my mother intended to make.  I haven’t met anyone of my mother’s generation that willingly had a child on their own.  They either divorced or broke up, but we all came from a relationship.  I’ve met quiet a few successful Black women who have said that if they aren’t married by a certain point in their life they were going to have a child on their own.  To each her own.

And I know where this thinking comes from.  It’s no secret Black women are least likely to marry.  And I’m sure these women will make amazing mothers, who will love their children unconditionally and do everything they can to give their child anything they could ever want or need, but that’s not for e. Given my line of research, I can’t, in good conscience, just have a baby just to have one.  If I have a child I want to bring it into the most supportive, loving and stable enviornment I can.  And to me, that means in a stable, happy and functioning marriage.

peace,
e.

This is why I write

Welcome to my latest blog, get comfortable. I’m a twenty-something living in New York City and doing social research at Columbia University. Got my MSW in 2007 and am going to apply to PhD programs this winter. Currently studying for the GRE’s (again… whomp) and trying to learn as many new words as I can before October. I’m getting my PhD so I can do research on the topics I want to, as opposed to what my boss wants. I enjoy what I research now but there are so many things I want to know about and I definitely have my own way of doing things. Since I can’t fully conduct the research I want to now (IRB and data contracts get in the way) I’ll play with my thoughts here.

Unlike SASSY, this blog is geared more towards my professional interests, namely Black fathers and families. (Hence that pic to the left of my dad and I) Why these? Well besides that fact that it’s now my career to study these things, I believe that strengthening Black families is a key component to improving and empowering the Black community (yeah I’m all about it). And if you couldn’t tell, I’m Black and I’m at that age when you start to worry about your future – are you going to get married? when? to whom? will you have children? Ladies, I’m sure you know the drill.

And of course, I’m always trying to improve my writing. I’m sensitive about my writing but constructive criticism is always appreciated.

A final goal of this blog is to grow some balls. Yeah I said it. I don’t say (or type rather) a lot of what I think. Although I am a self-professed hater, a lot of what happens in our society either totally pisses me off or utterly confuses me. Sometimes I don’t want to express my thoughts because they may be unpopular or because I’m afraid I’ll appear dumb. I’m trying to shake these fears, because it’s ok to be unpopular and/or dumb and if you engage me, maybe we’ll learn and broaden both of our horizons. At any rate, these are just my thoughts. Take em as you wish.

So stick around and enjoy friends.

peace,
e.

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