So I was perusing some blogs and someone mentioned this one – some single women choosing the single mother route.
“I don’t need a man to have a baby. I don’t have to find “The One” and fall in love and get married to procreate. My body doesn’t actually care if Cupid has shot my heart straight through with arrows. Love and sentiment technically have nothing to do with the fact that since my menstrual blood began I have been able to have a baby — whenever I want.”
This concept is not new to me, it just frustrates me. Yes, one doesn’t need a man to have a baby but so much research shows the benefits of two parents. I was raised by a single parent, and it was ideal considering what my father was up to, but that wasn’t the choice that my mother intended to make. I haven’t met anyone of my mother’s generation that willingly had a child on their own. They either divorced or broke up, but we all came from a relationship. I’ve met quiet a few successful Black women who have said that if they aren’t married by a certain point in their life they were going to have a child on their own. To each her own.
And I know where this thinking comes from. It’s no secret Black women are least likely to marry. And I’m sure these women will make amazing mothers, who will love their children unconditionally and do everything they can to give their child anything they could ever want or need, but that’s not for e. Given my line of research, I can’t, in good conscience, just have a baby just to have one. If I have a child I want to bring it into the most supportive, loving and stable enviornment I can. And to me, that means in a stable, happy and functioning marriage.